When Searching for Birth Family, Don’t Let Anxiety Get The Best Of You
In November 2005, we were hired by Debbie W. to find her daughter who she gave up for adoption in 1967. Debbie supplied the child’s date of birth, the name given to the child by her at birth, the city and state of birth, the agency, the social worker’s last name and the name of the hospital. We did not have the child’s amended name or the name of the adopting parents.
When we begin working on a new file, we supply our clients a few forms to complete and send back to us. Our having these completed forms allows us to act more effectively on our client’s behalf. (We’ll provide information about these forms and where you can obtain them in future posts.)
In March 2006, we sent Debbie an e-mail to remind her to complete and return the forms, which we had yet to receive from her. Here was her response:
“What good is a packet of forms going to do. I gave you all enough info to choke a horse, down to my social workers name. So far I have done all the running around and have gotten nothing.”
We sent another e-mail to Debbie informing her that the completed forms could assist us; however, we would continue to work on her file without them. Here was Debbie’s response:
“How much more info could you possibly need. As each day goes by, I become more and more unhappy with Omnitrace. It says in your ad 100% guarantee. People on TV find others everyday, without any co-operation from anyone. If there is a David that works there, please forward this to him. He said he was the only David there. This is going to have to go higher in the chain of command. I have said before I am going to go to the BBB. I might still have to.”
Well, in April, Chris, who is the manager of our research department made a breakthrough. He was able to obtain the names of the adopting parents. Chris and his research team were then able to search vital records and found a possible historical match on the couple. Things moved quickly from there on. Our researchers were able to develop a current address on the couple. With a little more research, we then established that they have a daughter who matched the date of birth of Debbie’s birth daughter. We knew that we had a match!
Subsequently, we provided Debbie her daughter’s phone number. Here was her response:
“I am still in shock, and I am very scared. When I get my nerve up, I will let you know if it is her or not. Do you really think it is??”
Yes Debbie, she is your birth daughter.